The End. 

 “If you look in the mirror and don’t like what you see. You’ll find out firsthand what it’s like to be me” 

 

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The Night I Drove Alone- Citizen

I ran away from you, now look how far I’ve got.
I shared some secrets that I hope you’d keep,
They’re words that don’t come out.
And I should’ve crashed the car the night I drove alone.
Escape from August cold.

And you talk like someone else.

I ran away from you, and now something’s killing me.
You hang me up as a souvenir of what I couldn’t be.
And I should’ve crashed the car when I was all alone.
Escape from all I know.

And you talk like someone else.

The Night I Drove Alone

October 19, 2013. 

I was cold. I was extremely intoxicated. I was alone. I was tired. I was afraid. I was heartbroken. 

None of these feelings are a reason to do something so extreme, so selfish. 

This night was ruined. This night was fucked a month in advance. Thanks to him. 

I tried to make the best of it. It was great with people, with friends, with someone new. 

He left, nothing hurts more than someone who can’t be with you because they are afraid of what their friends would think. If that isn’t the reason why, then why couldn’t he be man enough to just tell me that what we were then, was all we ever were going to be. That I wasn’t worth the time or effort. 

After the concert, after the drinks at the bar, and after all your friends have gone…it’s only you. 

Swerving home on 75N, doing 90. I thought about giving up. Letting all of my worries, my secrets, my thoughts…burn with me . 

Gently placing my right hand on the left side of the wheel, closing my eyes and making a hard right turn, causing my car to flip into a ditch on I75 didn’t seem like a completely awful idea. One thing stopped me… one person..

This pain was temporary. I can’t leave my sister. She means the world to me.